BAD TIPS

BAD TIPS

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    Read in this article the most important and useful tips that will certainly help you in training sessions. Top 10 recommendations for progress and success!

  1. Warm-up and stretching are for dweebs. Doing a general warm-up is a bad waste of time. Besides, if to warm up long and carefully, one may not remain forces on the main training at all. Stretching after training is in general for gymnasts. A true weightlifter must be like a rock: hard and inflexible. 
  1. Pre-workout is the best means of successful training. The most right decision is a double dose so that there is enough strength to break the bar in half.
  1. Before the entrance to the gym, surely wrap tightly the wraps on the wrists and knees, and put on the knee sleeves above. Remember, the more equipment on you, the easier the bar will be. Scientifically proven that the fabric on the joint can protect against trauma, however crookedly you squat. And surely you've heard the legend that the bar is afraid of the turned blue hands and shins. At the sight of this beauty, it flies itself above the head of the athlete. 
  1. Technical work with the bar makes no sense and no PR. If the exercise starts with 70% in a training plan, immediately put this weight and necessarily lift it as if there is already 10 kg more on a bar than your record: definitely scream and threateningly throw a bar on a platform. Let the rivals know your rage.
  1. To make things work, don't spare chalk. Be sure to put it wherever you can and more. Don`t forget to spread it all over the gym and necessarily clap your hands in front of your comrades – let them know what a "cloud of power" is. The whiter you are, the faster the bar will want to capitulate to you. 
  1. The hookgrip is strange, uncomfortable and painful. You need to be very naive to believe that one finger can hold more weight than five ones. Use a reliable grandpa method – a simple proven grip will not fail.
  1. Remember that power position is like you're having sex with a bar.  The more you show it your love by hitting the pelvis forward, the more you can lift. A bar like a boomerang: the stronger you take it away from yourself, the faster it will return to you and show its love in response. If in a snatch you feel like you've broken your pubic bone to blood and a salute is flying out of your eyes – you're on the right track.
  1. I have no doubt you know that strong arms are the main weapon of a cool weightlifter. At once in the starting position show everyone your strong biceps and necessarily, as soon as possible stand on toes, after all the secret of explosive force is in calf. 
  1. Don't even prepare before your lift – it's distracting, just lift sooner. And leave the horse all thoughts – it has a big head for it. 
  1. Try to change the technique and methodology of training as often as possible. Change your program every week: do a power position like the Chinese; go to PRs more often like Bulgarian; squat at the start of training like Turks; and be sure to lift with a jerk grip like Colombians. The more styles you collect in yourself, the more universal athlete you will become. By the way, do not forget about all moments of great champions: mysterious shake triceps, stomp with the left foot before the set in the starting position and show the tongue during fixation. Don't forget the laces of different colors on the weightlifting shoes. Since it helped them win, you'll need it too.

     And most importantly, after reading these tips – smile from the heart, breathe deep and start training correctly. From tomorrow... today!

TRAIN TOGETHER – TRAIN RIGHT!


3 comments

  • ivan

    lol, great funny read!!!!

  • Tom

    Coordinating calves and biceps in a cloud of power. lol.

  • Edwin Havik

    the best!! This will hit those who fits the shoe.. They know.. oh they know..

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